Dead Lizards & IT

January 15, 2010


I walked into my loungeroom and knew immediately that something was very, very wrong. The all pervading scent of death was in the air. And I knew exactly where the body was buried. Under the world’s heaviest couch there is a small cemetery for geckoes. Usually, I simply spend more time at the office until the smell dissipates – but I could tell that this was no mere one-day gecko horror. This was something much, much bigger. And if I ever wanted to sleep again I would need to rectify the problem pronto. Problem is everyone I know capable of moving this couch is also an athlete. Which means they have bad backs, dodgy knees, shoulder spasms or have just had a hip replacement. So after much searching I found a mob called “Hire a hubby” – who can attend to all the jobs that bloke’s in one’s life are no longer fit for (not that they are old or anything I hasten to add). They happily supplied two burly blokes (who apparently had no sense of smell) to move the couch for me and enable me to conduct appropriate burial services for two putrid decomposing skinks.

Anyway, it had me thinking about the importance of having really basic services in one’s life. I didn’t need the house reconstructed – just a couch lifted.

A similar service would be terrific in the IT world. I’d wrestled with that couch for two hot smelly hours before admitting defeat. And I’ve spent the last precious four hours staring at help pages online for IT assistance.  I don’t need the hard drive rebuilt on my computer, or someone to undertake complex coding. And I certainly don’t need a home network created. All I need is someone to show me which programs on my computer I can remove to create a bit more room to stop the whole system collapsing, or how to make a blog sticky note stick without me needing to go near anything that looks like:  <h3><a href=”<?php the_permalink(); ?>”><?php the_title(); ?></a></h3>
Yet it seems such services come with a pretty hefty price tag and/or a fair degree of sniggering.

I’m thinking there is a definite business opportunity out there called “Hire a 9 Year Old”, although I have heard that they don’t get out of bed for less than $100 a day…




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